Jobs and such,

So, I love it when God takes something you did on an off-chance and turns it in to something very cool. On an off-chance, I turned in an application to the Tacoma General Emergency Room, for an Emergency Services Technician job. This is the job I had before and this job is the reason I am currently pursuing recertification as an EMT. That was the off-chance. I also applied for 4 other jobs at TG as well, most of which I was qualified for. So the only call back I received was for the ER position, the one position I don't have the proper certifications for.

I get to interview for my old job with TG Wednesday morning at 9 am. The job that I wasn't qualified for and applied for on an off-chance. I asked the lady that called to set up the appointment if I needed to have a current EMT certification and she said "technically" but that the hiring manager remembered me and how well I had done in the ER when I worked there previously and wanted me to interview.

I feel good about going in there tomorrow and interviewing because I truly feel that God has set this up. I remember when I was laid off from pressure washing, I felt so strongly that God was going to give me something equal to or greater than that job. He is in the process of providing once again, as this job is a much better wage than what I was making before and there are always hours available, especially during the summer. It was such a joy to share that with the morning prayer group at church, because we had really sought the Lord for a miracle in this situation and it always feels good to rejoice over a miracle.

A verse that I ran across the other night before bed was Psalm 37:25

I once was young and now I am old
Yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken
Or their children begging for bread

As some of you know, living off of faith is not easy. It is hard not to look at the circumstances and wonder how they are going to change or the better question, when? But as David says in this Psalm, during his entire life, he had never seen the righteous (those that put God first) forsaken and their family was always taken care of. Right now, the family I provide for consists of me. I hope it expands someday, but even this small "family" of one is not to small for God to provide for in a supernatural way.

Depending on the interview tomorrow, I need to decide if I am to continue pursuing my EMT recertification. I will need to do it eventually I think, but it might be better to push it to Fall quarter when I can afford it better.

I can't wait to post tomorrow and share how the interview went and (this would be a dream come true) when I can start working there.

Tacoma Fire

Just so you all know, I am taking the test for the City of Tacoma Fire Department this Tuesday morning. Me and about 1500 other people will be crammed into the Tacoma Dome exhibition hall taking a test. I heard that they may hire as many as 15 people from this batch so the odds may still not be good, but they are better than normal.

I got the study guide for the test and every question on the test will be from the study guide, so it will pay to study. There are 5 sections to the study guide, so 5 sections to the test; Fire Chemistry, Tools & Equipment, Homeland Security, Emergency Medical Technician and Standard Operating Procedures. Some of the material is out of date, but the test is not necessarily about firefighting knowledge... it is more about how well I can absorb and study the material and show that on a test. I am pretty excited.

Is this the big thing God has just around the corner for me? I don't know, but it would be cool. I have a feeling that there is more in store for me soon than just a job. This is the kind of application process that I would be foolish to put all my hopes in, so I applied for 5 different jobs at Tacoma General. All would meet my needs, but some would be cooler than others. I am also enrolled in the EMT class this summer at TCC so that I can potentially work in the ER again.

So, the dilemma I have, and it is not a big one, is the EMT class this summer. Because of the nature of the class and the time commitment involved, I won't be able to be staff for the Aberdeen Go Camp and be a part of their outreach to Montana. I will also have to arrange class time to miss for the Go Camp PSCC is doing this summer... All of this is doable, it is just that I would love to focus on doing fun things like Go Camps and outreach all summer, instead of taking classes again in order to get good employment. So the dilemma I have is me wanting to put all my hope in a job with TFD or at the TG in the least, so that I can bow out of the EMT class and go to Montana. This would not be wise, and thank goodness I have submitted myself under authority and I allow them to tell me things. Mark told me that I will be a lot happier after the EMT class because I put the time in and am working at a great job for me.

I will also get a chance to meet and hang out with some cool people this summer in a class like this. Most people in Emergency Services have a very specific mentality, sometimes very interesting. My story with this mentality goes hand in hand with my testimony. I was convinced that I could handle anything, I had seen things that no normal human being should experience and I was still relatively sane. I learned to trust in my own ability and began to see the world as a place where I was solely responsible for making it happen for me in my life. If things didn't go my way, I got frustrated, mad and usually hurt people around me. The typical way for me to deal with emotion involved burying it so deep within me that no one would ever see it.

I am so glad that Jesus freed me from this mentality. The healthiest thing I ever did was to allow my heart to start feeling again. Yes, there is pain and trouble, but the overwhelming joy and love from Jesus Himself far outweighs any of this. Working again in this field will be hard, I will have to learn new ways of processing emotions instead of relying on my own strength and burying them.

Jesus has a plan and until I hear otherwise from the Holy Spirit and the men I am submitted to, I am looking forward to testing with TFD, getting my EMT back and potentially working in the Hospital again.

Walking on Water

So it has been over a month since I last posted on here. Sorry... Needless to say, a lot has happened in a month. This leads me right to the question, "What have I been doing for the last month?"

I have had friends leave, mostly good and a few bad.
I have worked jobs and am now unemployed.
I have moved into a new house and now it is infested with ants.
I have started riding a bike because gas is so expensive.
I have been writing songs and sometimes singing them.
I have come to realize that life really is a choice.

Isn't it funny how we pray sometimes and ask the Lord for things, and we are thunderstruck when he actually does what we asked? I remember specifically asking the Lord to bring to a place of Faith where if I don't hear correctly from Him, then I will not make it. Isn't it funny how He answers prayer. Now I find myself unemployed, and not sure what to make of life. If you want the whole story of my job woes, you can call me... it doesn't seem right to post it all here. I have rent, student loans, credit cards, medical bills from last falls neck injury and it seems like a thousand other little expenses. I know that the Lord is asking me to be faithful in my finances, AMEN!!! I love tithing and giving to the Lord, the only hindrance has been my laziness. But in this season of unemployment, this feels a bit different.

If we look at the story of Peter walking on water in Matthew 14:25-32 I think that is kind of where I am at right now. In the middle of a storm, in the middle of the night (in the midst of all my problems) Jesus is walking toward me.

I imagine the scene was something to behold, 12 guys straining at oars trying to keep a boat afloat and make it to the other side. All of a sudden, they see this guy walking on water toward them. All the other guys in the boat were saying things like...

"Dude, I think that's Jesus!"
"Yeah, it kind of looks like Him."
"Wait, how is He walking on water?"
"It must be His ghost!"

But not Peter. Peter may have doubted that it was Jesus, so he tries to convince his buddies that it is not Jesus, "Lord, if it's You, tell me to come out there." Peter didn't think that this God of Love would tell him to get out of a boat in the middle of a storm in the middle of the night and risk his life. Of course it was Jesus, so Peter ends up having to leave the boat and walk (on water) towards Jesus. Peter was wrong, this God of Love did call him to risk his life and step out of the boat and watch as He blew away his expectations of who God is.

The miracle here would have been for Peter to survive swimming in the lake in the middle of the night, in the middle of the storm. I think that was what Peter was expecting to do, to swim out to Jesus trusting that the Son of God wouldn't let him drown. That was probably a big step for Peter, trusting that God wouldn't fail him, but Peter still wanted God to meet him in his own strength. Peter was a good swimmer, he had been raised on the water and made his living as a fisherman, so swimming was second only to walking. By swimming, Peter is compromising a little, God can use me, as long as he uses my strengths. Peter probably could have made it to Jesus by swimming, strong fisherman that he was, but that is not what Jesus wanted. So in the middle of the night, in the middle of the storm, Peter finds himself walking on water, something that he never could have dreamed of.

I think that Jesus illustrates how when we step out of our boat, we shouldn't be surprised when the miracle we get turns out to be different than the one we were looking for. Peter thought that he was going to swim and meet Jesus, using his strength and God's help. All of a sudden, he is walking on water going toward the one "who treads upon the waves of the sea" (Job 9:8) What a difference, relying on God's strength and not our own.

After all this, to apply it to my situation... I am facing a storm. I love what one of the commentaries that I read said about this passage
"Though the wind was contrary, and they were tossed with waves, yet being ordered by their Master to the other side, they did not tack about and come back again, but made the best of their way forward. Note, Though troubles and difficulties may disturb us in our duty, they must not drive us from it; but through the midst of them we must press forwards."
The disciples had been directed by Jesus to go out into the lake, and they had even been given a direction, but then they ran into a storm. God told me and directed me to work in the jobs that I had, and now I find myself without them. I am not questioning God, I am looking forward to what He is going to do to replace them. God gives and takes away. AMEN!!!

I have a funny feeling that there is something that God is freeing me up to be able to do here shortly. I have no idea what it is and every time I try to speculate, I get the Holy Spirit telling me not to try and guess. So here I am, at that place of faith where if I don't hear and follow God correctly, I may drown... no matter how strong a swimmer I am.