Sorry for the long update.

So this morning I had a job interview with Mary Bridge Childrens Hospital. The position I am applying for is like the one I had before at Tacoma General, just in the ER that specializes only in children. I thought the interview went well and the lady seemed to be impressed with my credentials and experience. I think that I will get that job, but I won't know for a few weeks because some of the administration people are on vacation. I am excited, because if I get this job, the hours will be flexible and I will be able to work whenever I can. The other upside is that I can move up to a full time or more regular schedule over time, which would be nice.

I have been working a ton of hours here at Campus Save-me and it is going pretty well for the most part. Sometimes I feel like I live here, but that is ok. The overtime will make for a nice paycheck come the middle of January.

My Christmas was good, I got to spend more time working than I did with my family, but I think that it was ok. I also do believe that I spent more money on my parents than they did on me, but again that is ok... it is the thought that counts and they both got me thoughtful gifts which I really appreciate.

You know how sometimes people will just give money if they don't know what to get you? Well, that is my Grandma in a nutshell! She hasn't tried to buy a gift for me, either birthday or Christmas for probably 6-8 years. I did the easy route this year as well, buying my family gift cards so I wouldn't have to rack my brains to find them good gifts. I think that gift cards at least show a little thought about what the person might appreciate as a gift. I actually spent some time and thought about what kind of gift cards to give my immediate family, but whatever... I will get off of the soapbox now! I did make it through the holidays emotionally intact, though there were some moments that could have been really painful, so thank you to all who were praying for me!

Spiritually... where to start. I am in an ok place that is fast becoming a great place. One of the verses I am meditating on is Psalm 19:14,

"May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleaseing to You, O God, my rock and my redeemer."

It is such a fun verse to sit and think about. We all know that our words are very powerful and are the key to relationships, so watching what I say is super important to me.
I have been thinking a lot about ministry and where I go next and all that stuff, but the funny thing is, I don't think God cares about any of that! My personal times with Him have been very directed at getting my heart right before Him and realigning my emotions and priorities so that He is first in everything. It has been great.

I do run the gamut of emotions sometimes, from struggling to on top of the world. I feel like I should be a little more stable in my walk, but I need to realize that I am still very young in the Lord, less than 3 years, and that I have lots of time to be the man He wants me to be. I can be very hard on myself (and others around me!) for not being as mature as I think I should be, but I am slowly learning to lighten up.

I do wish that I was doing more in ministry, I remember last Spring when we would have prayer meetings almost every night! I felt God doing so much amongst us, it was awesome! I don't have that in my life. I feel like I am living a common life, with God thrown in somewhere. When was the last time I saw a miraculous encounter with Jesus? When was the last time I layed hands on someone and prayed with them? I guess I am learning to not measure myself by what I am doing and to instead see myself in my God given identity. I am the only person who can lose that identity, God dosen't take it away, so choosing to stand up and be a son of God is soemthing I desire more of.

So, I am in an ok place that I know is becoming a great place!!!

Merry Christmas

To all my friends and readers...

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Life after PLU

I am getting settled into the life after PLU, it is weird, but I will adjust. It is weird living in T-stad without people there, so quiet and un-obtrusive. It is great to be able to spend more time with Jesus, but I find that I want to watch TV instead. Don't worry, I will be good about my time with the Lord, it is too critical a time for me. Jennifer Furumasu has been very kind and gracious in allowing me to borrow her pots and pans over the break. I need to start cooking for myself, which I don't mind, but I don't have any food to cook so I need to work on that.

Jason Hulen came up to me before church and told me that the Lord had me on his heart lately. jason was telling me that he felt like I was in a transition time, which is definitely true, but that I was to seek God's heart and not the specifics of what I am to do next. I liked what he had to say... it kind of confirms some things in my heart, because he is not the first to say stuff like that to me.

I am excited for January... I hope that it will be a great time of prayer and fasting.

I am working 40 hours a week now and I will be through January at Campus Safety. The only problem is that on the January schedule I am slated for shifts from 4 am til 12 noon. I was not very happy when I saw it. I work that shift Monday - Thursday and on Friday's I work from 12 midnight to 8 am. I think I have the suckiest schedule alive and I will see what I can do to change it. Campus Safety has a problem with the guy who does scheduling because he does not seem to follow the availability of us employees. He seems to schedule us fairly whilly-nilly. I guess it won't be too bad, it will only be for 4 weeks and it is speeding up my deisre to find a new job.

Now that I am working more, I will have more time to write on the blog, so stay tuned for updates. I haven't had internet access in my room because my computer is old and slow so I haven't been able to keep up on my internet stuff.

PLU Grad...

That is right, I am officially a graduate of Pacific Lutheran University. I made it through all the long speaches and processionals to receive a little diploma holder that has a note telling me I will get my real diploma later. It was really fun today, but I don't feel any different. I can't understand why. It is really anti-climactic to still have school work left to do. I have one last project to turn in on Monday and then a class social meeting on Tuesday.

After the ceremony, we had a taco feed at church for friends and family. That was a lot of fun, people meeting each other and letting the many facets of my world interact. My school friends got to meet my parents and they got to meet some church family etc... I don't feel like it was a big accomplishment, but everyone else seems to think it is, so I just play along.

To all my wonderful friends and family, I love you. You really make my life better and I am a better person for knowing you guys.

I am really tired... I think Christmas break will be nice, a chance to sleep and rest. I have had a lot of stress build up over an entire semester, so it will be nice to dissipate that.

Papers

It is going to be a very busy weekend... I have to write 2 religion papers, both about 8 pages or more and finish up my capstone. I guess there is a reason why I am getting used to having no sleep and stuff, it is so I can stay up all weekend and work on these papers.

There is so much to write about, but most of it dosn't matter and wouldn't do any good here anyhow. One thing God was telling me yesterday was about living at a higher level. The illustration I saw was like this...

When you are a kid, you can get away with certain things and not get in as much trouble about them as if you were to do them as an adult. I feel that way in my walk with the Lord, I could get away with things when I was younger, but now I need to grow up in God and not settle for being a child anymore. I want to live my life set apart and completely consumed.

24 Hours Of Prayer was great. A lot of people participated and some of the artwork and log entries are fantastic. It is cool to see God move in something so simple as getting together to pray for 24 hours. Antonio and I were chatting about it and we both think we need to do more stuff like that!

I only have 10 more days after today until I graduate. Crazy...

Happy Thanksgiving

To all the blogger world, at least the part in the U.S., I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving today. I am currently on Vashon at my Mom's house, but I will be back at PLU tonight because I have stuff to do tomorrow.

Last night at Youth Group, I made this wonderful game in Powerpoint... it was Thanksgiving Jeorpardy. I was able to create links within the games main page to other powerpoint slides so it worked just like a game of Jeopardy. It was a blast!!! I was really happy with the game and the kids played it well. If you want to see it, let me know and I can show you how to make links within your powerpoint for all your future presentation needs.

Please pray for me today, I will need it...

Capstone

I present my senior research today at 2... (why am I writing this now?) It is on Tuberous Sclerosis Complex and I am excited to present...

Oh yeah!!! Afterwards I get to go to Rainier Hills and attend their Breakaway Conference with the youth (and Nate & Cori). It should be a good time.

I have some music and book reviews to post... 2 things in particular. 1 CD and 1 book that have completely rocked my world this week and have shown me such a picture of the Fathers heart troward me, His emotions, His passion and overall His beauty. It is awesome. It is really messing with me AND I LOVE IT!!!

I can truly say right now that I love Jesus more than anything! This is just where my heart is right now... look for the reviews coming soon on this blog.

I need to run and be all scientific.

Update

What a day. I woke up at 3:30 again today, I know I set my alarm for 3:30 at least, I didn't wake up until 3:40. This means that I must have grabbed my phone and snoozed it while still sleeping, weird... Work has been good, but I left today at 6 am because I was exhausted. I went back to bed for another 4 hours of disturbed sleep.

Last night at youth group was fantastic. Nate Boyt and I led worship together and it went so well. Nate is a great guitar player and worship leader so to co-lead with him was exciting. We also had the "big" church come in and join us, so it went well. It was fun, spontaneuos and God moved powerfully. I asked Nate and his wife Cori to pray for me before we started because my voice has been damaged from yelling at football and I haven't been able to sing very well. I can get really self-conscious about my singing voice, but God worked even in that and Nate and Cori commented about the prayer working because my voice was a lot better during the worship set than in practice. After worship, we watched a movie about the girl at Columbine High School who was challenged by the attackers, asking her if she believed in God and she said yes.

It was powerful and the kids were really touched by it, heck I was even tearing up a little bit! We broke up into small groups and talked about sharing our faith, I had a great group and we got to pray and talk very specially.

Afterwards, Nate, Cori, Nikki and I went to Applebee's and had Nacho's. The conversation quickly spiraled downwards fast, as we were all tired. It was fun though.

God is good, worshiping God is great and the future is exciting...

Ouch...

I need to be honest here. I have been going through a lot lately, most of it relational. Some of it is good, some of it is very painful. I don't need to tell any of the details, because even though this is the internet (most private place ever) and no one reads this blog anyways, details need to be kept low key. This blog has always been intended to be a place where the people who love and care for me can read up on my life and keep up with what God is doing in my life. I hope that this leads to prayer and support for me, it is not supposed to be a place of venting or mud slinging.

I do want to dwell on some of the good things. Chase and I have been hanging out a lot and we are developing a depth of relationaship where we can really share and support each other. Yesterday, after lunch, we hung out in the room all day. I was frittering around doing anything but homework and he was studying, but the conversation continued throughout the afternoon. I really appreciated it, because we were able to share our hearts without worry. I love you Chase.

Tabitha and I go running a lot. We both think we are fat (I tell Tabitha she is crazy to think that) so we need to exercise more. I find that I can run forever, but I doin't feel like I am in really good shape. I guess that I need to do more high intensity workouts where I sprint and use bursts of speed along with the cardio that we get to do. It is one of the drawbacks of being injured, I don't get the conditioning from football anymore. I need to generate the intensity of exercise for myself, I guess that is where the power of choice that we talk about all the time at football comes in huh.

I have been thinking and praying a lot about my future. The natural first question after people find out I graduate in 6 weeks (thats correct, 6 weeks) is, "What are you going to do after graduation?" People mean well, I am sure of that, but the question gets annoying. For the record, if I graduate (I am still waiting for another financial miracle) I plan on working for Campus Safety for January term. It is a good job, 40 hours a week, free place to live etc... After January, I would like to go and work at the hospital again, like I did before I went to PLU. At the hospital, I can make good money, with lots of hours and still have time of every week. I really do want to start building a financial base for my future and start correcting some of the mistakes I have made in the past.

As far as ministry goes, I am still uncertain. I would love to go straight into full time ministry, but that is not likely. I also would like to go to some sort of ministry training, like IHOP or Bethel church have. I think that a solid time of just seperating myself out and being immersed in an environment like those two places offer would be good for me. Thos are kind of pipe dreams at the moment, but who knows what God will breathe on and bring to life. I also would be happy to go to Paramedic school and pursue a career as a paramedic, but I don' t know.

There is my heart. It hurts right now, but it is full of dreams, vision and aspirations.

ANNE!!!

It is time for a new post on your blog, Anne... The last time you posted was Aug, 11th!!! I am about to delete your link and I don't want to do that!

random thoughts...

I have been downloading podcasts off of iTunes, stuff from Bethel, IHOP, Hillsong etc... It is great. I get to have some amazing preachers and ministers pouring into my life, everyday. I have also been getting a lot better about my time with the Lord, so long story short, I am getting over my spiritual apathy.

I think it is interesting that a lot of us, especially in leadership has been going through some really tough life issues, but I hope that we are turning the corner on some of that. I do feel that breakthrough is still needed and that we will only get through with unity and persistence in prayer. Bill Johnson, from Bethel Church, talked about unity and the annointing for miracles. He siad that he has never seen a child be healed when the parents were in conflict. The breakthrough (healing of the child) was prevented by disunity (parents in conflict). I think that we are experiencing some of the same situation right now, we have a good thing going at Ignite, but it could be a lot better!!!

The Lord showed me a picture the other day, it was like an archer shooting an arrow, but it was a flaming arrow. The arrow was shot into the pitch black night sky and it tore it apart. The Lord was showing me that my life is like the arrow, shot into the night sky on fire. I do not need to slow down and go at the same pace as everyone around me, because the worlds pace is actually backwards going away from God. I look to my friends so much for acceptance and love, so much that I can forget to run to God. In being an arrow shot out, I can forget about frustration, fears and failures, because they slow me down and will not help me do what God is calling me to do.

I am reading Corinthians right now, 1 Corinthians was really good, but 2 Corinthians is even better. So many nuggets, so little time. The one I want to share with you all today, because it will illustrate where I am at right now.

2 Corinthians 6:4-10

"... but in everything commending ourselves as servants (ministers) of God, in much endurance, in afflictions, in hardships, in distresses, in beatings, in imprisonments, in tumults, in labors, in sleeplessness, in hunger, in purity, in knowledge, in patience, in kindness, in the Holy Spirit, in genuine love, in the word of truth, in the power of God; by th weapons of righteousness for the right hand and the left, by glory and dishonor, by evil report and good report; regarded as deceivers and yet true; as unknown yet well known, as dying yet behold, we live; as punished yet not put to death, as sorrowful yet always rejoicing, as poor yet making many rich, as having nothing yet possessing all things.

I love the part where it talks about the power of the word of God and the Holy Spirit and the weapons of righteousness for the right hand and the left. It is really good, such goodness, ummm...

Here we go...

Sorry that it has been a while since I have been on here, but life has been hectic. Last week I had two papers and two presentations to do. Along with working 20 hours, Ignite and football school can sometimes seem unimportant. I have been the most studious of all my semesters here at PLU, too bad it is my last one that I finally figure it out!

It is cool how the Lord will give you strength for things. In fact, he will prepare you for a large challenge by giving you smaller ones to build you up. Last week was tough in the fact that I had a lot of work to do, but this week has been as tough or tougher with a large midterm (tomorrow in fact) and my capston being due. The capstone is a senior research project that everyone at PLU does, no matter the major. I have to write about my project for 10-15 pages, not really a problem, but it is such technical writing and I cannot use flowery language to stretch the pages. Good thing it is only the rough draft that is due tomorrow and I can e-mail it at any time tomorrow.

I realize that I put people in front of God, and I do it alot! I know that sometimes, especially when I am in charge of something, I seem to put people second to getting a job done and to some extent I do that, but I love people so much. It hurts me a lot wehen the people I love feel that they need to come to me and confront me with issues regarding how I treat them. I have had a few conversations with people the last few weeks about some stuff and it all boils down to how I communicate with them. I need to get better at communicating and being humble. Oh, well don't we all!!!

Long story short, I never mean to ride roughshod over people and I do actually love you all, so much that it hurts sometimes.

Ministry Glaze

Ever been so busy and done so much work in a short amount of time that you feel exhausted and just tired deep down in your bones? I am sure you have, so that is where I am at right now.

Sean Smith came to PLU and God did some amazing things. We saw about 10-12 people give there hearts back to Jesus and some amazing miracles of healing and people being set free! It was great... but it can tend to wear you out, no matter how much time you have with the Lord. Mark Wolbert calls it the ministry glaze because you get that look in your eye that readily identifies that you don't have much left to give.

So let me tell you the chronological story of my weekend, that ended on Wednesday night! I started fasting on Saturday and seeking the Lord for annointing while at the PLU-UPS game (we won 32-28). I really damaged my voice in the process by screaming so much. On Sunday, played bass and Sean spoke. It was a great time and it ended with me at the altar being prayed for during the ministry time and that was sweet. We had a lunch meeting as an Ignite staff and then I had to jet to N. Tacoma to my brothers 21st birthday. Even though I was late, it was still a cool time to hang out with the family and see people. I left the birthday party and got back to campus to tie up some loose advertising ends. I left to go back to church at about 5:15 and I helped set up for the next service with Sean at church. I also played bass that night and I got to talk to Mark about some stuff and was able to have him cover me in prayer for the rest of the week. Sunday night was more of a ministry time and a lot of people got very touched by God. On Sunday night after church, we randomly decided to drive out to Westport... at midnight. We all crammed into Tabitha's car, Emily Hockert, Nikki, Anne Syvertson and I. We made the drie out there, stayed on the beach for a while and then drove back. Long night, I didn't sleep because I had to be at work by 4 am. It was great, we all prayed for each other and we all just got met by Jesus. Tabitha got baptized in the Spirit and we all had an absolute blast. Monday was great, Sean spoke at our regular Ignite meeting and about 8-10 people accepted the fullness of who Jesus is. Tuesday we did a big all campus event and about 80-100 people showed up for it. The night went well and God really moved. We now have a large group of people who will need discipling and care so we need to plan for that and be ready to provide for the need. God is good.

Mark asked me to lead worship last night at youth group and it was my 5th worship service in 4 days. That is about 4 hours a day (average, some were a lot more) doing stuff related to worship; getting set up, practicing, playing and then tearing down. It was great, don't get me wrong but I was ready to be done playing my guitar last night after worship. Worship last night was great because the kids realy bought into it and began to encounter Jesus in a way I have never experienced before with this group. I was not at my best musically, but Jesus showed up and ministered to kids.

So I am tired. The ministry glaze is characterized by physical and mental exhaustion yes, but also by spiritual exhaustion as well. Please pray for me that I will allow the peace of God to sustain me and to carry me along these next few days.

I love the Ministry Glaze for one simple reason. It usually means God moved in a powerful way.

Sean Smith, before

In the pre- Sean Smith mayhem, life is pretty hectic right now. It is really cool to see God coming through in real and tangible ways right now. All of the advertising is done and paid for, and all of the results of it so far have been amazing.

We made these cool T-shirts that say, "Are you b.l.u.e?" on the front and the time of the event on the back. Jennifer Furumasu, Emily Hockert and I were up til about 4 am making the shirts and the look really cool. People have been asking a lot of questions about them and it is getting a great response. We have about 21 shirts and hopefully we can have 21 people wearing them on Monday and Tuesday.

Sean Smith is speaking at church this weekend and then he will be on campus for 2 nights. We will be short of money, but the Lord will provide.

We are really looking forward to what God is going to do. It will be a crazy night... and I have to work at 4 am the next morning.

Colossians

I love the book of Colossians... It is a wonderful read for me right now in many ways. I am super busy and I get really good at not spending time with the Lord and Colossians is all about the person of Jesus and how He is Lord of everything.

Colossians 2:9

For in Him all the fullness of Deity dwells in bodily form.

Such great passages are in this book, I am really getting blessed by meditating on them. It has been a rough emotional few weeks and this book provides so much comfort for me right now because of the centerpiece of Jesus. If I can look to Him and let all other things fade away, then I will be doing better.

It has been a healing week for the most part. I sometimes think that I am hurting more than I know and it is just a matter of time before it all comes out, but I also know that I have amazing friends and confidants to help me through this. I drove coaches and trainers to the airport yesterday and it was painful to leave them at the airport, I wanted to go to California with the guys so much. But God is so good and so much better than I can even know.

Colossians 3:3-4

For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.

The song Blessed Assurance comes to mind.

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! O what a foretaste of glory divine! Heir of salvation, purchase of God, born of his Spirit, washed in his blood.

This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long; this is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long.

Perfect submission, perfect delight, visions of rapture now burst on my sight; angels descending bring from above echoes of mercy, whispers of love.

This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long; this is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long.

Perfect submission, all is at rest; I in my Savior am happy and blest, watching and waiting, looking above, filled with his goodness, lost in his love.

This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long; this is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long.

Update on life (hot off the press!!!)

I am warning you all now, this might be a long post. I guess that is what happens when you don't write for a while, it all sorta builds up and then comes rushing out. Well, I guess I'll just get started.

To bring closure to some things that may be still open... I got my stipend back from Campus Safety and along with it I am now working 20 hours a week, the maximum I can work during the school year. I will be making $8.50 an hour and I am going to be talking to the boss people about promotion to supervisor which would pay an even $9. The one down side is that I have almost all of my hours between 4 am and 8 am. I am not sleeping much, but I will manage. I wake up every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday at 3:30 am and shower and dress for work. I get to work and I make some tea and put it in my PLU mug that I have. It is amazing how grown up I feel because I drink tea in a mug!!!

Ignite is going great right now. We are really building momentum and I love seeing what God is doing. I got to talk to Chad Johnson today about a lot of things (more on that conversation later) and we chatted about Ignite. One of the things he told me was that it is all about intimacy with Jesus. I know this, but I forget so easily because I am so easily clouded by the things I am doing. I get to handle a lot of the administration duties for Ignite and I feel like that is a full time job in and of itself. I am super busy with a lot of things right now and one of the first things to go is my time with Jesus. I am challenging myself to put that first before anything else. Lance Powers, who spoke at Ignite last night and was so annointed, said that God does not want to be #1 in your life. If He is #1, that implies that there is a #2 and a #3 and so on. God wants to be the ONLY thing in my life and I need to let Him be that for me.

Sean Smith is coming in 2 weeks to Ignite and I am getting excited. I want to make some T-shirts that have a cool phrase on them and have some key Core people wear them for a bit before the event to build some energy about it. God we need about $200 to make this happen and do it at a top notch level with the T-shirts. We also need about $800 on top of all that to defray the cost of Sean and his wife staying here and eating alot, etc... We have the venue all lined up and even though I am still working on the gear we will use, it should be fine. Conferences and Events told me today that we cannot use the sound equipment from the church, because we are required to rent from Media Services. This is frustrating, but I will see what I can do about all this.

I am really happy about the transition at PSCC with Lance Powers coming in as the new senior pastor. He is a dynamic guy in love with Jesus and I can't wait to see what God does in my church. Also, bringing Nate and Cory Boyt along with him is a huge plus and I can't wait to work with them either.

So now to the depressing portion of the update. I will never play football again.

I have a, "...moderate to severe compression of my spinal cord in between my 4th and 5th cervical vertebrae." Long story short, if I get hit the wrong way, I could become a quadraplegic or worse. Heck, if I get in a bad enough car wreck, my odds for serious spinal injury are way up. I saw the neurosurgeon today and we talked about my MRI that I got and he showed me a portion of it that showed a very clear impinging on my spinal cord. I told Scott our head coach and David one of our line coaches about it today, so the team will know soon enough.

I have been struggling with Stingers as they are called for about 3 weeks now. When I was playing, I would get 1-2 every practice at least. Our training staff wisely decided to sit me out for a bit and to have me see the Campus health center. I met with them and they decided that I needed to go and get X-rays of my neck. I did that and showed them to Dr. Mariani, our team physician. He also examined me and found that I was weaker on my left side, the arm I would get stingers in, than I was on the right side. He decided that an MRI was needed to see if there was any structural damage to the spinal column. Because Dr. Mariani sees more knees injuries, hes a sports medicine specialist, than neck injuries, he sent me to a specialist, Neurosurgeon Dr. Anthony Harris. That is where I went today and I saw Dr. Harris and he told me the news about my football career.

He said that I could have surgery to fuse the C4 and C5 vertebrae, but because I am not having symptoms for the most part, he said that was probably not the best idea at this time. If symptoms do come back, then surgery on my neck is something I will probably have to get.

I am not really sure how to feel right now. I am ok for the most part I think, but I don't handle trauma and pain very well. I tend to bottle everything up and not let it be expressed. I feel the same as I did when Eric Fergen died, kinda numb I guess. Maybe it is the Lord's gracious mercy not allowing me to experience the full depth of emotion about this. I came to PLU to play football and football at PLU changed my life. I would not know Jesus the way I do today if it had not been for men like Frosty Westering, Chad Johnson and others who have gone through the PLU program or been around it. The program is very special to me and I don't want to leave it, but that is the beauty of PLU football, I can do other things that don't include playing and still be a part of the family.

I got back from the doctors today and went out to practice. Dr. Mariani was there and we got to talk for a bit and turns out he knows Kaj pretty well and is a believer so he prayed for me, right out there on the field and everything. We talked about a lot of things and he has been such a great resource to me it is incredible. Dr. Harris gave me some things to do to strengthen my neck still and to maybe relieve some of the pressure on my neck. That will be my competition, seeing how hard I can work to get well and put myself in a position to not have any long term effects from this.

I can't help but feel let down by this. I never really got my chance to play for PLU on the field. I was either injured or there was someone starting in front of me. I love competing and I love working with others to achieve a goal, two things football offers in spades. Never getting that chance hurts a little bit. Also, realistically looking at it, what if I had never earned a starting spot this year, how would I have felt about myself later. I can at least say now that I was injured my entire senior season and never got a chance to suit up. I love football, I love this team, I love the program at PLU, I love the guys... the question I am facing is do I love God more?

I think that I do. I will get through this, prayeras and hugs are always appreciated, but I will get through this.

classes

I was looking at my class and reading schedule for this semester and the thought hit me,

"WHAT AM I DOING!?!?!?"

I am taking 2 reading intensive religion classes on top of my writing and research intensive capstone class. I am being good, I have started to get ahead and hopefully I can stay that way. I also do not have classes on Fridays, so that will be a good homework day.

My religion classes will be interesting and challenging at the same time. One of them is examining the life of Martin Luther and the process of Reformation. I am going to enjoy this class and I have some cool friends in the class that can help me if I get stuck. The other class is an Old Testament class and we will be looking at the Old Testament in many different ways, like Source Criticism, Rhetorical Criticism and Form Criticism. The goal of the class is to gain knowledge of the different methods of literary criticism and we will be using the Old Testament as our text.

My Capstone class is the senior research everyone at PLU has to do within their degree field. I was going to do mine on the relationship between early childhood exposure to antigen and the relationship to the occurence of allergies later in life, but I found out that I cannot do that because I already did a major project on that topic for another class. They want us to do some original work that we have not already done before. So I need to find a topic to research and fast, because my proposal is due at the end of this week and my outline and bibliography is due in two weeks.

I chose a science major for one of the added benefits of not having to write as much, and now I will be spending long hours in front of my computer typing away.

Football is going good, I am very excited to have our first game this Saturday and I know that the offense will be ready to handle business.

Wow...

I haven't been here in a while. Posting on my blog that is... Football Camp officially broke last night after our scrimage. I will be starting class this Tuesday at 8 am!!! The scrimage went well, as a team we looked decent (the defense looked awesome, but they always do in the scrimage). I did not play very well and I ended up having to sit after two series because my back hurt pretty bad. The trainer and team doctor told me it was a muscle thing, and since it is right next to my spine and it hurt, they didn't want me to go back in and risk further injury to other parts of my body because I would be guarding my already hurting muscle. It is frustrating to sit and watch when I should be out there competing, but what could I do?

Church was fantastic today, I am sure Pastor Tom had a message for us, but he never gave it becasue we spent the whole time in worship. It was really great... Worship rolled straight into communion which was fun and meaningful. I am treasuring every time I get to spend with him because after Lance comes on board, he won't be around as much anymore.

We have a meeting for Ignite tonight and I hope that it will clear up some questions I have been having, like, "what is my role?" "Where are we going this year?" etc... As of right now, I will give everything I can to this ministry until December and then I will look at it in light of my being a graduate and see what God wants me to do after that.

We have our first game this Saturday at 1:30 pm at Sparks Stadium in Puyallup. The Puyallup Fair will be going on then as well, so get there early and enjoy the free BBQ by Thrivent Financial for Lutherans that starts at 11 am. Let me know if you are going to come and need tickets, because I can get 4 free on my own and then I can use other peoples free tickets they are not going to use to get more free for my friends and family (students get in free). Even if I am not getting any playing time, come experiene PLU magic for yourself.


I will have more time to post as the year settles into a routine for me.

last blog for a while

I will be starting the last football camp of my life, so I won't be posting for a while.

We will have a week of practice and then we will leave for Breakaway on Friday morning to return on Sunday afternoon. Next week is another week of practices and then we will be helping out with All-Campus move-in day. School will start after the second week of camp so the schedule gets a little easier, from a football sense. We will be having a scrimage on Sat. Sept. 2 at Sumner High School (I think) and our first game is at home, Sat. Sept. 9, Sparks Stadium at 1:30 pm.

I may have some free time in the evenings, so call me and we will see about that.

If you are praying for me, then you can pray that I will not only survive camp, but I will thrive in it. I hope to avoid injury and I want to perform well. Pray that I will total release every pratice and that I will continue to get better.

Most important, pray that I will continue to seek Jesus in a dark environment and a busy schedule. I need Him more than ever.

Thanks for a great B-day yesterday (sorry for falling asleep).

See you in the school year.

23

It is my birthday today, In case people haven't noticed. This is but one more step until I am over the hill, 23/40 = 58% over the hill. If you really want to get me the best gift ever, you could find a Taylor 410 CE and buy it for me (list price of about $2000).

I got back from Alaska on Wednesday night (after a 2 hour plane delay) and I have noticed some really interesting things. In Ketchikan, I feel like there is an abundance of faith. People believe that if they pray for their friends, they will get saved; if they cry out to God long enough, He will step in and alter the situation to His glory. I find that I lack that here sometimes. I tend to look more toward the thing I am doing and less to the thing God is doing. I feel that there are many things that God will ask me to do for Him, but instead of saying to God, "Look at what I am doing for You" I should be saying, "I did what You asked, what is next?"

The place of waiting and trusting the Lord is where I need to be and where our ministry needs to be.

The Lord showed me a cool picture (I know how you feel sometimes Joy, because this is hard to convey properly). We were at the prayer meeting in Ketchikan on Tuesday night and about 80+ people were there. We listened to this cool soaking prayer thing, I don't know who it was by but it was very cool. There was a part where he talked about the room of intercession in the heavenlies and it floored me!!! I was standing in the back and I saw a picture of a person in the spiritual armor of God. This armor was very functional and well used. The armor was in really good repair and the person was ready for battle and experienced in warfare. The armor was customized and was perfect for the individual, allowing them to move freely and effectively. I am reminded of a verse in Song of Solomon 3:7-8. The people who wear this kind of armor are people who have been in the wars and have seen things most people have not.

Compare this to other people who just went to the store and bought their armor yesterday. It is shiny and new and it is strong enough, but you can tell it has not been used much. You can always tell the people who are just getting into a new activity, say hiking or fishing etc... They always have really new gear that somebody at the store told them was good or they are using the outdated gear from their grandpa. They have not taken the time to make the gear perfect for them. You can always tell the duffer or the weekend warrior by the gear they use. In battle, improperly working gear could be the difference between life and death.

I want to be a person who has the fully functional armor and who is ready for battle. I don't relish battle or wake up thinking I need to crush some demons face in order for my day to be a success, but if it come to that, I am ready to do that in gear that has been fitted and tested and well used by me.

Are we Christians who have the overriding faith that God is bigger? Just because we have been called to ministry (Ignite leaders) doesn't mean that the work is done. We are like the people who have been issued our armor, now we need to get to work. The spiritual battle here in Tacoma is huge and we cannot back down. The weekend warrior won't go out and fight if it is raining or if they feel a little pain (from an old war wound, to be sure). The seasoned professional will battle through any odds. We are called to a full time ministry here on campus, whether we know it or not and we need to press through the little things that hold us down and rise up to the big things that God is calling us to.

Pastor Terry in Ketchikan said it very well when he talked about C (or Sea) level Christians. They can get by with living in a compromising situations and compromising their faith, God has grace and forgiveness. But when you get to the B level or A level, you will have to make some serious commitments. If we rise to this level and we don't begin to clean our lives up, we begin to take His grace and forgiveness for granted. We also allow a door to be opened for satan to come in and have his way in our lives and in our ministry. We have been chosen to be a higher level of Christian than we were and I know that is our heart. Lets go for it and not hold back or be held back...

Much love to everyone.

No really I mean it, I love you all

Happy Birthday to ME!!!

The importance of prayer

Why do we neglect the importance of prayer? I have found at this church here in Ketchikan such a passion to pray and to see God move that it is uncontainable. They take prayer seriously here and they take the young generation seriously here as well. Charisa and I are going to a prayer meeting tonight at the church that about 70 people are expected to show up for.

Can you imagine a prayer meeting with 70 people?

We went and joined the pastors, interns and other leaders for prayer this morning and it was powerful. God is up to something big and it will be cool to see it. I have some great thoughts for prayer next year and I can't wait to talk about them with some of you...

See you all soon,

ALASKA!!!

I am in Alaska!!! Dude, I have always wanted to be here and now I am. I flew in on Friday night and the city is really interesting. It reminds me of Aberdeen in many ways, it is an old logging town, economically depressed, but God is up to something here. There is such a life in the church out here, the pastoral staff is running after Jesus and God is doing stuff. This church loves to pray!!! I mean really love to pray.

Charisa and I were scheduled to speak at the 8:30 service and we showed up at about 8. They started a prayer meeting before the service at 8:15 and it was amazing. The entire worship team, interns, pastors and everyone else who was there began to pray and pace the sanctuary. They would pass the microphone around and people would pray and Holy Spirit shows up. They prayed for a while and as people showed up and came into the sanctuary, they continued to pray. They went straight into worship at about 8:35 and that was really cool.

I got to speak and I talked about the generational blessing that God wants to do. People really received the word and I was happy with it. I was a little nervous because I have never spoken in front of a full church at a main service before. Maybe it was a mental hang up, I have a real respect for the main service. I need to do stuff like that more, I like to preach and I like to minister, I just need to practice. It went well though, I wish I could have laughed more however.

Charisa got up after me and spoke about some stuff that happened to her earlier in the fall. I had heard about what happened but I didn't know the entire story. Hearing her tell it was powerful.

I am having a great time here, but I can't wait to get home... I am meeting some really cool people here and I am getting a chance to hang out with them.

Nikki, we need to figure out when I am flying in on Wednesday. I will call you or post it here.

See y'all later...

Talladega Nights

I have been working so hard for football these last few months, that it is good to see some reward for that. I have noticed that I am better prepared for this season than any other football season of my life, so I am happy. I want to go out with a bang, as it were. A word to the wise, don't eat potatoes O'Brien before doing an extreme workout. I ended up puking 5 times after my running workout on Monday. I made it through today's workout better, no puking, but I didn't eat very well today, lots of sugar and junky food that dosen't quite fill you up. Long story short, I need to eat better, because I have been doing really good and I have noticed the difference.

After a little team 11 on 11, we went and saw Talladega Nights, the ballad of Ricky Bobby. It was a stupid movie, but it was so funny at times. It was good to go out with the guys and hang out as well. Lots of laughs were had. The best part of the movie had Michael Clarke Duncan trying to dig a knife out of... well, you will have to go and watch it.

I finished my last shift of the summer today, and as expected, it was boring and long. I got to play Maggie's guitar though and that was fun.

I leave for Alaska in Friday and I am excited. I will try to post on the blog while up there, but no promises, it is Alaska after all. I heard they got electricity the other day for the first time, so I figure that HiSpeed internet cannot be far behind. Pray for me in Alaska...PLEASE!!!

I don't say this enough, but to all my friends and faithful readers, I love you. That is right, I love you. You guys all mean the world to me and I couldn't make it without you all.

Life is Good

I got to lead worship on Wednesday night and it was so much fun. We took over the main sanctuary at church and had a really full woship team. We had a rockin set and the kids even responded a little bit!!! Mark preached a great word and kids were really touched.

I put these links in my sidebar, but you should check them out if you get a chance... (thanks Joy!)

everystudent.com
waymore.org

Both of these sites are run by Campus Crusade for Christ and I was surfing on them for a little bit andi thought that they were fantastic!!! So many practical answers to tough questions and they all relate God's amazing love for us in each answer. Cool beans!!!

I got to go to Eugene, OR and visit Montana for a day. Weird traffic going down and silly construction projects just north of Vancouver coming back. While there I got to see Anna Palmquist, a fellow intern last summer. She is in a very hurting place right now, so pray for her please. I don't think her story needs to be on the blog, but pray for her.

Montana, Kat (his novia) and some other Onyx House peeps went to this place called Wildwood. It is probably 15 miles south of Eugene and it was so fun. It is a natural waterfal that has carved a pool about 30 feet deep in this rocky area. The sides of the pool are about 20-30 feet high and we spent all day jumping into the water and swimming in the pool. It was so pretty, if you are ever making a drive through Oregon on I-5 and you have some time to stop and swim, DO IT!!! It is a little off the beaten path, but well worth it.

I worked 13 hours of wonderful Campus Safetyness yesterday and it was fun. I got to work with my friend Callie and we talked about everything. It is amazing sometimes the things that come up in conversation when you spend over 8 hours with someone doing a fairly monotonous job. I also got an e-mail from my cousin Ken who is a Seargent in the Army, serving in Iraq. He is a linguist, so he dosen't kill people, but he is still over there. It was cool to catch up a bit with him and hopefully he will read the blog, so welcome Ken!!!

There is the update, I can't think of anything else to write about. Oh, except God is good... Yes He is. I don't have a specific reason to say that currently, I mean there is no recent blazing example of His goodness in my life, but He is good. He is reminding me of that and I like to remeber things like His goodness and His love.

Peace out.

No Phone...

I am bad about this sometimes, but I don't have a phone working right now and it is difficult. I want to call people and talk, but I can't. I will hopefully have it back by tomorrow.

I feel like we are stressing so much about fall and what we are going to do as a ministry and sometimes, we forget about Jesus in the whole mix of things. Yes, we have organizational issues. Yes, we will have many battles on our hands. Yes, I still have no idea what Chase is going to do all year. Yes, I feel like my hands are tied in many ways and that I could do more.

All of these things do not matter. What is Ignite anyways but an insignificant ministry on an insignificant campus. The only thing that makes us significant is Jesus. He chose us, He loved us and He provided for us. We forget that sometimes. There is only one formula that will work this fall and only one way to reach the goals (that we still need to set) we have.

Jesus

It is not complicated, it is simple. Let Operation PUSH begin, because He is ready for it. Let's serve and love Jesus for today (as Pastor Lance said so eloquently) and then worry about tomorrow and what will happen then when tomorrow gets here and becomes today.

I QUIT...

I quit many things; striving, worrying, planning and sharing my heart inappropriately.

What do I write about?

I dunno what to write about, it has been too long since I last posted... Many things have happened in the last week, where to start.

We will work backwards...

Today I got up and went to my grandparents house on Lake Taps to do some trench digging for them. It was good to spend some time with them and bless them with some hard manual labor. It always happens, but people I work for like that say a job will take 3 hours but, I get it done in half the time. I was able to finish the trenches and then haul a bunch of loose rocks and then move an entire pile of bricks. I am currently working, I have almost everything done that I need to have done and I am just over an hour into my shift. I have maybe a half hour of work left, which leaves plenty of time to write on the blog...

Friday I worked all day... I mean all day. I started at 11 am and finished at Midnight. 12 hours of Campus Safety. No big deal, it was a good shift. I usually spend time praying for campus as I am normally by myself, just driving around. It is good. I also got to have lunch with Dan Donohoue, which was also very productive.

Thursday I road tripped to the Gorge to see Hillsong United. They were amazing!!! I already love their music and worship style and I am very grateful to have been able to worship with them at Creation. Just seeing the way they do things and getting a glimpse into what God is doing in them to change the worship world as we know it. It was also fun to hang out with Nikki, Wes and Charisa, even though Charisa and Nikki couldn't keep up with Wes and I. The suntan expanded on my upper arms, so I was happy.

Wednesday I worked out and then did Youth Group. Sometimes it is like pulling teeth with the kids, but we need to keep pressing on. I had a dream today about walking around PSCC and having a large Youth Group and childrens ministry going on there. I was kinda excited about that. I played worship, then we had a game. The game consisted of some very gorss things and I was not to stoked about some of them. I took a huge bite of what looked to be a whipped cream pie with Sour Patch kids in it, only to have a mouth full of cold ravioli and whipped cream. We all conspired and threw the remains of the pie at Andy Armstrong and made a huge mess on the floor of the mezzanine. Nikki spoke and did a great job. She spoke on Ephesians 3:16-19 and how we can know the love of God.

Tuesday I worked my 8 hours after working out in the morning. After work, we had a football function and I got to play center. It is the only position I have not played on the O-line, so it was cool.

Monday I thought I was only working for 4 hours, but I was actually on for 8. I was planning on going to work out after Campus Safety, but I missed that. I told Wes about Hillsong at Creation and that is what started the whole idea of going to the Gorge. After work, I went over to the Ministry House and saw that a team from church was praying over the house. We went into the prayer shack and started praying. They began to pray for many of the things we, as the Ignite leadership team, had been praying for the last few months. It was really cool to hear other people confirming what the Lord has been saying to us.

Sunday I drove back from Lake Chelan early in the morning so I could get to church. Lance Powers spoke about identity. I really liked what he said, especially the part where he siad that we can get so caught up in what our identity that we lose sight of the person who gives us that identity, Jesus. It was a great word and it was fun. After church we had a Cook Out, and even though I don't think I get tons out of the Cook Outs, I think that it is good that I am there to support Malia and what she is trying to do with our group.

Saturday I left early in the morning with my sister Laura and her family to go to Lake Chelan.
The Lake was a blast, especially having my nieces and nephew there. Got to swim all day and then have amazing steak that night for dinner. After dinner I got to talk to Laura and her husband Heath about some stuff and then we got to pray together for a while. It was a very special ministry time and I was able to challenge them and give them some practical advice.

I think that takes care of my last week or so. It has been an eventful one. I haven't even scratched the surface of some of the things that are on my heart. Long story short, I need to be pored into more. I have my time with the Lord, but it is never enough. I have been stopping short of that amazing place in personal devotion, not quite getting there, either from lack of time or motivation. I really need a way to get poured into on a more regular basis, Sunday is not enough and Wednesday night... don't get me started. I have wonderful friends, but even they do not challenge me very much sometimes. I really need more friends that are male to share my heart with. In my life I can think of a small handful of people that I share my heart with. Mark Wolbert is on vacation and even he dosen't challenge me very often. Jonathon is never around and we live to far apart. We might move in together after I graduate, but we will see about that. I need more strong men in my life who are my age. It will be good to have Eric Grenniger on campus.

Wow, a long post... this happens when I don't post for a while. I'll try and get better.

Alaska

Wow, for those of you who don't know, I will be going to Alaska on Aug 11th and coming back on Aug 16th. Charisa Nicholas and I will be going up there to visit her parents church and I am pretty excited about it. I have never been to Alaska and I have always wanted to go. I am really blessed, the two states I most wanted to visit, Alaska and Montana, I will have visited this summer.

I also heard that I am speaking at the 8:30 church service in Ketchikan. Charisa and I are even in the church bulletins already.

Wait, hold on, ME???

I have never been asked to speak at a church before and somehow I don't think it will be the last time. Usually when I get to do stuff like speak or lead worship, it is at PSCC Youth and there it seems sometimes that I am kind of the last resort.
Oh, no one else can do it, so we will ask Samuel.

It really blesses me to have been asked to speak somewhere, it means that they want me to and that they are waiting to hear what I have to say. I don't know why, but I have some self-confidence issues about being in front of people. I keep waiting for someone to say,

Stop Samuel, you actually don't know what you are talking about.

Call it irrational fear or whatever you want, I like to think of it as my wanting to please everyone and have them like me. I know that this is not the right thing to be feeling or to think about, but it is there. But to be asked, speaks to my heart and really goes a long way toward lessening that fear. I am very blessed to fly to Alaska and I want to bless them as well.

Bruce Clapp, my intership host Dad in Aberdeen asked me if I would consider coming back out to Aberdeen to lead worship for them. That also really blesses me. I am not an incredibly confident musician and Aberdeen has been a really challenging place for me to lead, because I would try and do it out of God's plan. To be asked to come out and lead suggests that they trust me in music and in worship, which is nice. I always hear that God has a timing for everything and I guess that I am starting to see that.

So pray for me as I embark on this adventure, God only knows where it will go.

Go Camp 2 days later

I am ready to start another Go Camp this week. I had a nice day off yesterday and I am energized to get going again!!! It was an amazing week and thanks to all of you who came out to our final Sunday, it was a real blast.

The week was great, but not because of any amazing Holy Spirit encounters (although He did show up) on my part. Instead it was more of a reinstatement of what God is doing in my life. I got to Aberdeen on Friday and we had a staff meeting to pray and talk about the week. I was still hurting a bit from Fergen's death, but God worked through that. Then Teen Leadership Training started and the week was off to a flying start.

Whenever a Go Camp happens, the enemy attacks it. Usually he will attack the kids, but this year he attacked the staff. All of us were exhausted, especially in the first couple of days... when we shouldn't be tired yet. We pressed through it and I ended up not being very tired at all for most of the camp. Afterwards, I was exhausted and fell asleep on the beach, I have the sunburn to prove it.

So many things happened, I can't begin to tell them all... we had about 4-5 kids give their lives to Jesus, 4-5 more get there prayer languages and dozens of rededications. The numbers are cool, but the best part was that God was there. We had amazing teaching from Ryan Loffer, Doug Marks, Jake Broady, Kit Hackett, Zoanne Wilke etc...

I got to do worship a handful of times and it was great. I really grew as a worship leader in this arena because I would learn I was doing worship about 30 minutes before we started. I like more time to prepare, but God does His thing no matter what I do.

Eric Grenniger and I were in charge of Young Warriors, the boys 10-14, and we just poured into them. They slept in the sanctuary with us guys, but in a seperate little nursing mother type of room. Every night I had to tell them a bloody ER story and a joke before they would go to bed. This is what I did last year as well and they remembered it and wanted it again. We had a good group of guys and I rode them hard sometimes. 3 of the 6 were special needs kids so that presented some challenges, but we got through them fine. Most of the guys were in the Hands team with me as well so I got to boss them around even more!

I felt kind of bad sometimes because I was hard on them, but in retrospect and after talking with Jake about it, it wasn't such a bad thing. They needed that kind of hard yet loving attention. Eric and I let the boys pray for each other and stuff and they all really warmed to that and liked it alot. It was a huge win for us as a staff to see these guys blossom.

I wish that I oculd have been in some of the performances because I really like doing that kind of stuff, but I had to be at the funeral on one of our big performing days.

I am going to post some of the thoughts I have post-Go Camp on the leaders blog, feel free to read them Here

Aberdeen

I will be in Aberdeen for the next 10 days staffing their GoCamp. It will be fun, but it will be interesting as well. So I will not be online for the next bunch of days.

Eric's memorial is on Saturday the 15th at 10:30 am. I will be leaving Aberdeen to go to that, so pray for the people going to his memorial.

Pray for me in Aberdeen as well. Last year was really cool, hopefully I won't be too cynical for this year to be cool as well.

The 4th and the aftermath...

Well, the 4th went off pretty well, I didn't kill anybody and Sarah, Matt and I got to speak castellano a lot (sorry Nikki). My mom really went all out for this and made a ton of food which was very delicious. Joseph BBQ'd, something he loves to do and we played a rousing game of Mafia (way to go Sarah for fooling everyone). The fireworks were so fun, it was a 30 minute show that seemed to never end. There would be something that looked like a finale, but the show would keep going. Jonathon and his novia Brittany came out as well and he brought a ton of fireworks. If there is one thing Jonathon likes to do, it is celebrate the 4th.

The van was amazing, especially when we ran out of gas and had to coast on fumes to the gas station... that was a highlight. We made it though and I only fell asleep once on the way back to Tacoma from Southworth.

I went to work out yesterday at Competitive Edge at about 4:30 pm and when I finish my workout, I check my phone and see that I had 2 voice messages from Mark Wolbert, 1 text message from him and another missed call from him... He needed me to lead worship at youth. I was planning on going back to my room and showering, getting dressed and then showing up a little late to youth... NOT.

It was great, I put together a list, called it in and Jonathon Kvamme put together the stage and got the words on the computer. Welcome back to the Kvamme family, by the way. The Lord really used it last night, I don't know how, but He did. Nikki got to play piano and I was very grateful for that because it added so much and she was a backup in case I turned into a blubbering mess before the Lord. It was great.

Amazing love, how can it be

That You my King would die for me

Amazing love, I know it's true

And it's my joy to honor You

In all I do, I honor You.

Jesus, You are my King

Terrible news

I just found out this morning that a good friend of mine at PLU, a fellow O-Lineman, died yesterday in a tragic accident.

He will be sorely missed and I don't know how this team will be without him.


Man, I never got to tell you how much I loved you, or how much Jesus loves you and for that I am really sorry. I remember all the good times we had in Montana; the horseback riding (you falling into the water), sailing (again you in the water), V-ball (somehow you had energy to play) and my bachelor party. I love to compete with you on my team because you never give up and you won't back down from anything, even Nose Tackles who way as much as your bench press. You are an inspiration to all of us and your work ethic spoke volumes of who you are. You told me once that your definition of an EMAL man was someone who really cared and looked out for his friends and stood by them. You exemplified this in all of your life. Your frineds are a testament to who you are and the steadfastness with which you apporached relationships. You are one amazing leader and I wish that you were able to play your last year of football. All of us in EMAL nation will miss you and how much fun you were to be around.

internet problems.

I have been having technical difficulties for the last while and I have tried everything I know how to do, yet I am too lazy to take my computer in to get it fixed...

I feel like I haven't posted here for a while and it is probably true... For clarification sakes, my bachelor party was in Montana and the band that was playing at the bar we went to noticed the large group of guys standing around and asked if there was a bachelor party going on. All the guys thought it would be funny to shout my name and say that it was my bachelor party. No, I have not proposed to anyone yet.

Last week I coached at a football camp put on by my O-line coach Trevor Robetrts. It was a blast, so much fun! the kids were all 9-13 and they really worked hard. I was very tired at the end of it because it takes a lot of energy to coach, especially kids that age. What a good time though.

I also started to work out at Competitive Edge again. I am paying $70 a month for them to kick my butt and get me ready for the season. I really enjoy the workouts, because I know I am getting better and that I am putting myself in position for the most success I can have in my last year of football ever.

I also found out that when I am cynical, it is because I am trying to avoid pain. I have lots of woundings in my heart (don't we all) and it is less painful to be cynical about them than it is to deal with them properly. I have been praying Psalm 139:23-24 and it is very tough sometimes, but I want God to take care of the little things in my heart that hurt so that I won't be cynical anymore.

I will be going to Aberdeen for GoCamp starting this Friday!!! I really am looking forward to it, even thouigh I know I will be exhausted. God is going to do some wonderful things out there and I am happy to be a part of it.

Shout out to Eddie, even though she is gone, we all still love her. I can't wait for you to get back so we can hear what God did in Vietnam.

Sorry for the length of time between posts, I will try to get better.

Hello from Montana!!!

I am here in the coolest place I have ever been to in Montana, ok it is the only place I hae been to in Montana. I have been fishing, camping, 4Xing, boating, horseback riding etc... I even had my bachelor party the other night! Tonight we are going to have a steak fry after about an hour ride and then go skeet shooting. Yes I will be shooting a gun.

The place is really nice and all the staff is super cool. It is also really good to get to know the senior football guys better.
We are having a blast and I can't wait to show you all the pictures.

I will not be going to Fresno next week so I will be around.

Sorry about the drought.

It is funny how the weather in WA will change on a whim. Not 45 minutes ago I was completely soaked to the bone just walking from my truck to my room. This wasn't the normal, "Oh, it's raining" rain. This was the, "Quick, lock the doors, batten down the hatches and hide the children, the end of the world has come!!!" rain. And now it is sunny and everything seems right with the world.

I went and saw The DaVinci Code last night and I have mixed feelings about it. I finished reading the book yesterday afternoon and I wanted to see the movie. I knew it had gotten some bad reviews and stuff like that, but it was still a pretty worthless movie. The only redeeming quality was that it did not glorify the act of sex like the book did. As a story, I have read better in a Tom Clancy novel. I did really like the artwork presented in the book and how Dan Brown talked about it, but he was super quick to jump to conclusions about what the symbology actually meant. It reminded me a lot of the PLU religion department. The movie altered the book a bit, but they did a fairly good job of staying true.

I have a super busy life coming up... I am going to hang out with Marc Wymore from Puyallup Foursquare and then hopefully visit my sister Laura and my nieces and nephew. At 7 pm I have a graduation party for Diabdra Brewer at her house. Tomorrow I work from 4 am to noon and then I need to get on the Island so I can go to my sister Deborah's graduation and the BBQ afterwards. On Sunday, I am on the worship team and after church I will drive to Flathead Lake, Montana. I will probably be driving by myself, so pray for me on this trip.

I will be spending about 5 days there at Flathead Lake lodge with some friends. None of these guys I am hanging out with for the week are saved and most of them are very happy to live debaucherous lifestyles. Please pray that I will be able to model the LOVE of Jesus to them and just walk my walk without feeling the need to preach at them.

Hopefully, I will be able to go to Fresno, CA and hang out with Chad and Michelle Johnson. Chad is taking a group from his youth department down to the Dream Center and hopefully God will provide a way for me to join him on this trip. If any of you guys feel lead to give me extra air miles or money for this trip, I would greatly appreciate it.

I will get back from Cali (hopefully I go in the first place) around the 2nd or 3rd of July and I will be hosting a BBQ for the 4th at my mom's house on Vashon. I will probably stay around the Island for a little while, because I don't get to hang out with my family all that much.

On the 7th of July, I will be heading out to Aberdeen to staff the Go Camp out there. I am really looking forward to this opportunity to be with my friends out there and be a part of what God is doing out in the Grays Harbor area. I have had this blocked out in my schedule since last year's Go Camp. I just love being in Aberdeen, I love what God is doing and the people are fantastic. They literally have to rely on the Holy Spirit so much out there that it is cool to see. Doug and Jake are doing an awesome thing with what the Lord has given them, I am happy to just be a part of it.

After Go Camp ends, the 16th of July, Campus Safety will start again. I am still trying to go to Ketchikan sometime in the beginning of August, but again the Lord needs to provide. Football will start August 19th (the day after my birthday) and then school shortly after.

I love being busy!
(Anne, you should be happy because you usually know my schedule better than I know it myself.)

This might be a long post...

I am almost ready to buy my Taylor... YEEEESSSS!!!!! I applied for a loan with my truck as collateral and I got approved, I just need a co-signer still. It was weird to hear that I needed a co-signer, I guess I don't have as much credit as I thought I did. I have good credit, on the high side of good, but I don't have a lot of it yet. I am trying to get my dad to co-sign for me and hopefully he will. This loan will allow me to get out from under some killer credit card debt and hopefully get me a killer Taylor guitar.

It would be so nice to have that guitar because it would allow me to play as often as I wanted and not have to deal with the not as nice acoustic I have now. I also put up for auction on ebay some of my old gear that I bought but don't ever use. It would be cool to see that stuff take off and sell for a decent price. I will use the money I earn from that to pay off the truck loan I will get and that should help out a lot.

I went to Aberdeen on Wednesday and that was a ton of fun. I got there early and talked to Doug about some stuff and we just chatted which was cool. We talked a bit about the Go Camp, that is obviously on his mind a lot right now and we talked about some cool ideas they have that I will get to be a part of. Jake had asked me to come down and play guitar for them and to share a little something. When we started talking about what I was going to share about a week ago, I had 15 minutes. On Wednesday as Jake and I were driving all over Aberdeen looking for Alpha-Bits cereal, Jake told me that I had 10 minutes. Right before he called me up to speak he told me I had 5 minutes. That was fun, a real quick and fast presentation of the fact that God likes us! He doesn't condemn us and that He is looking to forgive us. It was really cool and very fruitful. Afterwards we played a lot of cool games, most of which involved stuff outdoors, goofing off and getting dirty. After everyone had kinda left, Oliver asked us to pray for him. We did and it was really cool. We don't do that enough at PSCC, pray for each other. I think I will just start asking people to pray for me about everyting. This doesn't need to clog the altar, but just grabbing some people after service and having them pray for you is powerful!!!

I should go, I am starting this crazy adventure by meeting with Marc in less than an hour.

Oh, yeah I need to pack and find plane tickets and make this happen!!!

Love to you all

Random thoughts from a random mind

I love talking about the Lord!!! I have had so much opportunity to speak life into people and they may not even know it! I worked with my friend Tabitha today and we talked about so many things, like her Lutheran background and why she thinks the Lutheran church will die off. She told me a story about a time when their pastor preached on the steps of the altar and away from the pulpit and how people left the church because they were so outraged. She also informed me that they still think that drums are sacreligious to have in worship!!! I asked her if I could come down and lead worship at her church and she said no! She is so primed to go off the deep end in her relationship with Jesus, I can't wait.

I was talking to Kelsey Dawson yesterday and she told me this amazing story. She told me about this church in Seattle where this guy was spending time in the prayer room after service. This guy go tso full of the Lord that he could not stop speaking in tounges. He left the prayer room, still speaking in tongues, and found the gal he was courting. He walks up to her and just can't stop speaking in tongues. All of a sudden she yells out, "YES!". He had walked up to her and proposed in tongues and she through an interpretation had understood it! That is how I want to propose!

So we have a lot of work to do on campus... There was a conference this weekend with a woman named Amma. Long story short, there is a lot of demonic debris on campus and we need to begin to pray. I will explain more about Amma in a post soon.

Oh, Lord that the heavens would stay open and that your Spirit would continue to empower us, your people, to boldly proclaim who You are. You are the God of truth, forgiveness and healing. Only You can save our campus.

Open Heaven

I have been working on the Ignite newsletter for about a week, trying to get everything together and printed properly and stuff like that, so I have been at the church a lot lately (I feel like an Intern again). We finally got the newsletter mailed today (138 of 180 so we got most of it done) and I am happy about that.

I have been talking about the Lord so much, I am almost sick of it. I talk with almost everyone at work about stsuff pertaining to Jesus and I don't even start the conversation most times. I am meeting lots of people who are hungry to go deep in Jesus, but they don't know how or what that looks like!

Last night I went and helped my Dad pack up some of his stuff so that he could move to the Tri-Cities. We got to talking about some of his pet subjects, like scalar magenetic weapons that can create and modify weather. He seems to think that there are some many different things out there to destroy our country and that he needs to lead people to the "truth". I told him that I know 2 things and beyond that I don't need to know much more; Jesus loves me and I love Him. What else is there? Yeah I know I need to be prepared and to make myself ready for the times ahead of the church, but I know that Jesus is in control and I look to Matthew where it talks about worry. I can't add a single second to my life by worrying, so why even try it?

There has been this group on campus this weekend known as Amma. They are a Hindu cult and they pay a lot of money to stay on campus! I was talking to Kaj about them and he commented, "They will let the Amma people on campus but not a pentocostal!" How true. PLU seems to be trying to lose the image of a Christian university. I know that it isn't a Christian school, but it seems to be more concerned with being accepting then on pretending to be a Christian institution anymore.

I think that it is ironic that Valson Abraham is at PSCC this weekend, the same weekend the Amma group is on campus at PLU. How perfect that the man who has helped plant 3,000 churches in India can be ministering to us college age students tonight while the demonically possessed "mother" who Amma's worship is hurting people on our campus.

I do feel like there is an open heaven over PSCC and that it is extending into my life as well. I am excited about this new season and I hope that it is a long one!

Anyways, I am really tired, because I am sitting here writing and not moving anymore (I worked from 4-12 earlier today).

work

I am working 4 on, 4 off and then 8 on and 8 off, topped off by 8 more hours on top of all that. I will be working 20 of 32 hours from Friday night to Sunday morning... Oh yeah, I am on worship team as well.
I will get bursts of sleep in 3 1/2 hour spurts... Why am I still writing here?

Oweing something...

I went to the gym today to work out and I came to a realization. I don't really want to work out and I am not really motivated to become the best football player that I can be this summer. As I was running on the eliptical, I had a thought... I owe this football program so much. I came here to escape from a horrible experience at UPS. I had heard of the program at PLU and how great it was and how the players were more important than the scoreboard and I wanted that. I came here and Chad grabbed me, first by having morning bible studies and then by meeting with me and allowing me to be myself anf spurring me on to growth in Christ. Chad would never have had that opportunity if it were not for PLU football.

I owe PLU football my eternal salvation in essence. Paul writes to a slave owner in the book of Philemon about accepting back a slave that had run away and joined himself to Paul. Paul writes and urges Philemon to take this slave back and to treat him as a useful brother, reminding Philemon, "not to mention to you that you owe to me even your own self as well." Philemon 1:19.

I owe PLU football a debt I cannot repay because I was able to experience Jesus in a way I never thought would be for me. The only way I can pay this debt is by hard work and long hours in the weight room and on the track getting better as a football player.

In the same way, I owe a debt to my Savior that I can never repay. He came and grabbed my heart, it was not Chad even though God used Chad, but only by the work of His Holy Spirit. When faced with such debt, we have two choices...

1) Realize how big it is and decide that it is too big to even attempt to pay off. This leads to ignoring the debt and hoping that it might go away. This never works, because as much as we pretend the debt doesn't exist, it still is there.

2) Realize how big the debt is and decide that we should take Jesus up on His offer. He paid the debt already and all He asks is our own lives in return. We can choose to acknowledge our debt and decide to try and pay it by living with everyting we have for Jesus.

I love the Ragamuffin Gospel because it illustrates the point that we are paupers at the doorstep of God's grace...

Abba, I am a pauper, I need You to come and make my debt go away. I am left with only grattitude for what you have done for me, Lord let me keep this attitude of gratefulness and teach me how to pay off my debt here on earth, living for You completely.

Let Summer Begin

I am ready for summer to start. I look forward to all the things I am going to be doing this summer, especially praying and stressing over whether or not to buy a new Taylor guitar. I was looking at it and if I sell back some of my used gear that I have and never use I would lessen the cost by a lot. It would make it affordable, I would still ahve to finance it, but more affordable than it was!

I am looking forward to working at Campus Safety for the summer to, what a mission field! I won't sleep at all on the weekends, but I know it will be fun. I am actually working right now... just getting paid to post on blogspot!

I get to move into Kreidler Hall today after church, that means I need to pack up my room in T-Stad before I move in. I don't like moving very much, it is such a hassle, but I need to do it!

Eventually the sunshine will return and I will have my days off to enjoy it!

Done...

I am done with all my finals... yeah. whoopi. attaway. huzzah. and all that jazz.

I dunno. I feel weird right now. I don't know why either. God is not being very clear as to why. Oh well,

Eddie said something last night that was really true, I don't laugh enough. It's true, I don't laugh enough... There is really nothing I have that brings me joy or happiness. A sunny day? Seen that. A beautiful sunset? Doesn't really impact me. A cool new experience? I don't really care. My best friends? I probably take them for granted more than they take me for granted. Sure I may seem like I am having a good time and all, but inside... something is missing.

Ephesians 6: 13 ...and when you have done everything to stand firm... Stand firm...

I will stand firm on the rock of my salvation. Let everything else in my life be found as false, but let my Jesus remain the same.

Lord teach me to put my trust and to get my assurance from you. Lord show me where I am trying to get approval from man and what I need to give up to you. I want to surrender to You, but I don't know how or what. Jesus, I don't have joy in my life... What can I take joy in?

It's game time...

On Sunday, Joanne Ramos likened our time and the current season of the earth to a game that is tied and has gone into overtime. She also said that in a tied game you do not put in the third string bench warmers.

I love this analogy!!! I love being in close football games and having to strain with every ounce of strength and will to get the job done! That excites me! A couple of things about this tied game here in the last days.

In a close game, every action and every play is dependent on everyone. Sure there is one person who looks like the hero, but they would never have been able to do this without the supporting cast around them busting their humps to get the work done. If I fail at my job, we lose the game.

What pressure! What excitement! What an opportunity!

There is always the one or two people who in close games wanted the ball and knew that they would make the shot to win the game. Michael Jordan was one of them and he did, he would always get teh ball in the last seconds and make the shot! I want to be the person who is entrusted to win the game at the last shot.

I remember during my internship last summer, we did a GoCamp (10 days of pure fun/exhaustion/Holy Spirit/greatness). One of the things we did was host a basketball tournament at the Taholah Indian reservation. My team made it to the championship round, it was tough, but we made it!!! It was kinda funny sometimes, I was the big 6' 2" guy and I was playing with 2 ladies. Both ladies are really good ballers, so I would pass them the ball and let them beat these guys. We ge to the championship game and we are tied at the end of the time period. We go to overtime and the way we were playing was the next point would win. We got the ball first, missed our shot so they got the ball. We made a defensive stop and got the ball back. I wanted the ball. I got position on my defender, they passed me the ball and I hit a NBA worthy turn around jump shot from the baseline that caught nothing but net. WE WON!!! I was so excited I jumped and screamed, it was honestly one of the most exciting moments in my athletic career.

We are in that tied game right now here on campus especially, but also in te entire city/world! We need to rise up and "play" like we are capable of. In the tied game analogy, we are the million dollar athletes that they have on the team for moments just as this.

John 12:27-28 "Now My soul has become troubled; and what shall I say, 'Father, save me from this hour'? But for this purpose I came to this hour. Father, glorify Your name."

We have been placed on this campus and in our city/world/work/wherever else for this exact time and this exact hour. He specifically went out of His way t recruit us for this cause, knowing that no one else could do the job.

I love this, I love the feeling after a hard fought battle on the football field of coming off and knowing I left everything out there. I love knowing that my opponent got the very best of my effort, I could not have played any harder. I think that is the attitude I need in my faith. I need to get to heaveen completely exhausted and so ready for an eternal rest because I gave my everything to Christ and all that He gave me, I left it all here on this field!

Finals Week

I have one test down and two more to go. I have also completed the final paper that is due today in 45 minutes. I get to do a mini presentation on my paper, but it will not be all that difficult.

The final I had this morning was in Animal Behavior. This is probably my hardest class but the final he gave was identical as last years. I got a copy of the final from last year to study from and work on, so I was set to go! I felt really good about it.

My paper is really cool too. Thanks to Eddie for her mad editing skills, (she always seems to be correcting me) you made it a lot better.

Is Playing in the Dirt Healthy?

The benefits of early childhood exposure to antigen.

This will probably be my capstone next fall as well, so I am excited to have almost 10 pages out of 25 done already!!!

Yeah for finals week!!!

Procrastination...

I love to procrastinate and not work on things that I should work on. I have been fairly good at getting stuff done, but I have some work ahead of me yet.

I completed my first jury ever today. For those of you scrathcing your heads asking, "what is a jury?" it is a "test" for everyone who takes a private instrument lesson during the semester. I performed two pieces for my instructor and another music department faculty. I wasn't really nervous before hand, but once I got in there I was a little tense. It was fun though! I got through the first piece ok and then went on to the next piece, which is a little bit more difficult. I started ok, kinda quiet, but ok. I was supposed to play the first part twice, but I played it three times because I got done with the second time and forgot it was the second. I got through the rest of the piece without too many major disasters. I felt really good about it and while I am glad it is over, I wish I had more lessons to do so I could learn more. I played both of my pieces from memory, so that looked a little better on the evaluation. Both profesors gave me good evaluations, so I was happy.

I have gotten my final paper done, mostly I do need to put some finishing touches on it, so I have been fairly productive today.

Finals week will be fun as always. After this, I only have one more semster of college! I also will probably not be taking a class this summer. Instead I will take a class next January in Mexico! It will be more expensive, but I have always wanted to study abroad and this is my opportunity to do that. Taking a class next J-Term will allow me to devote more time to Campus Safety, church and working out. I am excited.

Well now we have momentum...

I love it when I get to see Kit Hackett. I love how God uses her to speak into my life and into the lives of others... Tonight she came and spoke to our Ignite group and God really blessed the time. Worship was fun becasue Nikki took a step of faith and led by herself, no piano, which leaves me to play guitar and carry the group musically. I enjoy that challenge because it grows me as a player and as a leader. It was really annointed too...

I got to talk with Kit before the service started and I told her something that I had received in prayer earlier that day. I had a thought that Jesus was arriving at the Cave in a very regal and royal procession. He came to the front and sat in a throne that we had for Him, but as He was walking toward the front, worship started and the musicians began to praise Him and the assembly started to as well. He sat down and worship continued, eventually He stopped us and Kit came forward and Jesus gave her a script to read from. She stood up in front of us and spoke His words directly.

I told this to Kit and she was really excited to hear it. As she was walking to the front to speak to us, she grabbed my arm and said, "Ok, I've got the script." and boy did she!!!

Jesus was on the move and He touched everyone in that room.

I love it when there is a move of the Holy Spirit and people get ministered to... I kinda wish that we could have had this earlier in the year, but I am happy that we received this even now. I told our leadership core on Sunday night to not hold back... Who cares if we offend people, we aren't going to see them in a couple of weeks anyways... People did not hold back either, they went after Jesus and He showed up.

Yeah for God!!!

The Storm

I feel a change in the weather, I think a storm is coming (don't read to much into that, I just noticed that the wind changed)...

And on a side note, I think that this summer is also going to be a time of intensity and change for all of us. We will not be the same next fall... I am glad for that. Lets learn from this year and do better next year!

I got to hang out with Wes for a while today. We talked about a lot of things, especially Ignite and some of the ideas and dreams we have for it. Wes is going to come alongside the ministry as an administrative type of guy and I am really excited about that! We need some organiation and structure so that we can be effective on campus.

One of the other things we talked about was the question about whether God would bring revival to a ministry that is not ready for it. We both think that the answer is no (God feel free to prove us wrong, You are sovereign) because when God moves, the enemy tries to counteract the work God is doing. If we as a ministry are not super solid, than satan will be able to get a foothold and tear us apart... Good news is that I believe we are on the right track, there will be some speed bumps, but we are going the right way.

I am on a roll right now!

I think that I am cursed (blessed?) because on my next shift at Campus Safety, I got off at 4 am on Saturday morning and went back at 12 noon that day, we had a big car accident that we responded to right on campus. More Fire & Rescue for Samuel!

I know that I am called to a Pastoral type of calling, but I do enjoy the adrenaline rush of emergency scenes.

Kit Hackett came to PSCC on Sunday and it was really cool. She taught for about 20 minutes and then invited the Holy Spirit and started praying for people. She prayed for Eddie and it was really cool to hear God confirm some things in her life. God said that He loves it when she dances and that He calls her a princess. All of these things rang so true... Nikki, Joy, Anne and myself were laughing. Kit also prayed for me and the word came that I am a gentle giant! I like that description of me. She also likened me to Peter, who is willing to do great things for the Lord, but sometimes says the stupidest things... She prayed for an increase in wisdom and discernment so that I would be able to do great things for the Lord without getting into too much trouble. I was laughing again during this, becasue God is so cool to speak stuff like that over me... Kit also said that she has always liked me, which I don't hear very often from people.

I heard a rumor today, from Dan so it is more than a rumor, that we might be leading worship at PSCC this weekend. I am excited for that, because I have wanted to get up there for a while! I hope that Wes can lead because I really like playing with him.

I get to go to work today at 4 pm, and knowing my streak right now, I will get another gnarly scene to clean up and deal with!

Fire and Rescue

I love working for Campus Safety, I put in 8 hours last night, got off at 4 am and have to be back at 12 noon!!! It's ok, I got some sleep... until Chase's alarm went off! We had such a crazy night last night. There was a big party off campus and a kid got beat up pretty bad, so we had to call CPFR to come and take him to the hospital. That took a good 2 hours or so, because we had to write the report and clean up the bloody stuff and all that other good stuff... I got there and kinda took over the scene from everyone else because I have been doing that kind of stuff since I was 16.

As the paramedic's and firefighters got there, it made me realize that I do actually love the whole EMS world. It is crappy sometimes (every once in a while literally), but it is so amazing. I started remembering things and how to do stuff, aaaahhhhh!!!!!! I got to give a short report, I have always been told that I give good shorts and I loved it! Maybe once I graduate, I will start volunteering for CPFR! I love God, more than anything, so is there room in my life for the Church and Fire & Rescue? I have always wanted to go on Medical Missions to poorer nations, but I need medical training to do that...

I enjoy the whole knowing how to help someone in their time of real need. I guess that is only physical however, and I do know how to help someone in their spiritual time of need. How do you combine the two? I didn't feel led to pray for the kid right there and see him healed ( I did pray for him, by myself) I think he was too "altered" to understand what prayer was anyways.

All in all, I hope he turns out okay, but I have discovered that maybe God put the passion for EMS in me for a reason... Maybe the only reason I got involved in the Fire Dept. wasn't trying to overachieve and prove to everyone I was a success. I know that with Jesus, I will always be a success in the eyes that matter most, but it is so much fun for me to be in that environment.